4 steps to goal setting (that no one is talking about.)



I should start by saying that I am currently 33,000 feet in the air. It’s -51 degrees up here, and we are going 585 mph. Y’all… this is 100% opposite of a good time for me. I am scared to death. Flying isn’t my thing. To top it off, I am traveling alone.  My hands are so clammy. I feel nauseous. This just isn’t my favorite thing to do. Actually, I despise it. Thoughts go through my head like what is my mama’s-boy going to do without his mother if something happens. Yes, I’m that dramatic. Worst case scenario here… all the time.

The new year has brought so many new opportunities for me and my business (hence the plane ride). On the surface, it all looks so good… glamorous even. I am in a Mastermind led by a photographer who is known world-wide. I am taking my business in a new direction… a better direction. I was just invited to speak on the Online Success Collaborative Pod. (It’s a good one, check it out here!) It’s exciting. It looks so fun. But what you don’t see are my nerves. My anxiety. My fears. My failures. Right now I’m literally on the plane ride to HUGE goal of mine… and at this moment in time it isn’t pretty. I’m scared. I’m on bumpy plane ride. I miss my son already. There’s a lot of negative. So, why? Why am I doing it? Just like a good run, the hardest part is starting, and it always feels so good when you’re done.

I know I’m not alone in this. I know you have goals and dreams, but I think we can both agree that path isn’t easy. No matter what you may be doing.

Ironic. We just hit some serious, serious turbulence on this flight.

No matter what the goal, big or small, I always feel the same way starting out. Anxious. Scared, even. I felt it when I left my teaching job to pursue photography full time. I felt it when I went into the hospital to have our son. I felt it again when we brought him home. Anxious was very real when I signed a lease for my first studio. And now here I am… on a plane. Oh, the places photography has taken me.

But don’t be fooled. I’m slightly miserable at the moment. If I could turn this plane around, I might. I already miss my son. I wonder if he is having a good day. If he’s ok. Oh, a mommy’s poor worried heart. And here’s the thing, I knew I was going to feel this way. I always know I am going to feel this way. So, I prepare myself. This is how I approve any and all goals (big or small.)

4 steps to goal setting (that no one is talking about.)

  1. Take yourself seriously. Reread that. Let it soak it. Do you take yourself seriously? Do you think you can really do what you are setting out to do? Really. Do you? Start today. I don’t care what the goal may be… if you feel called to do it, own it. Believe it 100%. Do. Not. Apologize or think that must explain yourself to others. I’m going to say it again, own it. You CAN do it. You are going to do it. Once you’ve got that down, you can start. Raise your hand if you find this task difficult (I’m waving my hand like a mad person over here!) Just start telling yourself that you can. That you are! Do this every single time you doubt yourself. Do it 100 times a day if needed. You are worthy. You can do it. Let’s start by believing it ourselves!
  2. Write it down. I know, I know. You’ve heard this before… and there’s a reason why. It works. There is something about writing down your goals that make them seem more real, more tangible even. But what people are not saying is that you need to write it down daily. Not just once. Yes, daily. If whatever you are doing means that much to you, it worth writing down.
  3. Don’t let your self down. Ever.
    This one is important. If you’re like 99.9% of the population, you have said you were going to do something and didn’t do it. In order to do big things you must, must, must trust yourself. You say you’re going to do something… DO IT. No questions asked. No excuses. Be like Nike, and just do it.Now, we all know someone who has let us down. That wound may not even be healed. maybe it still stings with me bringing this up. Sister, you can’t control what other people do, but you CAN control yourself. Don’t let yourself down. Which brings me to my last point…
  4. Take care of yourself like you would a needy person who has been put in your care.
    I’m reading a book right now called the 12 Rules of Life (I’m actually listening to it. I’ll be honest, it isn’t an easy listen… I can’t imagine it being easy or enjoyable to read.) However, he made such a good and valid point (and I’m paraphrasing here- remember, I’m still up in the air with no internet connection.) “Take care of yourself like you would someone who is needy and has been placed in your care.”I’ve never, ever, ever been good at self care. In any form. First, I don’t like spending money on myself.  I would feel guilty for buying clothes for myself or splurging on something that I knew wasn’t going to have a good ROI (return on investment.) But I’m learning I’ve been wrong. Treating yourself pays off HUGE in the long run. When I feel good, I get more done. I am more confident which in return makes it easier for me be bold and dare to dream and accomplish my goals. The payoff is huge. Take cafe of yourself.

Start today and apply these four steps to your goals. Take yourself seriously, write it down, never let yourself down, and take the utmost care of yourself. As Lara Casey, the CEO of Cultivate What Matters, says, “there’s nothing magical about January 1st.” Start today, my friend. I couldn’t be more glad I started… if you’re reading this live, be sure to follow along on my IG stories. This scary plane ride (and the 1000 other scary things I’ve done to get this far) is going pay off huge. I know they will for you as well!


Cheering you on always, Kayla





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